A few weeks ago, Kenyan women went on sex strike; as a way of forcing the political leaders to agree and get on with business.
The exercise made headlines; drew laughs and revived the heated debate whether women's rights are respected in Kenya and whether it was a ploy for the women's movement to relaunch its campaigns that were in top gear a decade ago but seem to have lost steam.
In one of the news items on TV, there was this bitter old man who was interviewed about the sex strike and said; "tutawachapa, wajue ni nani amewaoa" meaning we will batter the women until they recognize they are married.
It was easy to laugh about it; because of the intonation but the man was not mincing words. He looked like those men who will start beating the wife in the presence of their kids or chasing her through the whole neighborhood.
I had a chance to engage a few women and men on what they think about the debate. The most interesting answer was from a woman who could be my mothers age mate who told me that women have always had a way to use sex to get whatever they wanted, provided it was within the confines of their bedroom.
The challenge of such a publicized campaign was that men who would not have otherwise demanded for sex would do it and start a fight about it.
She argued that the sex boycott could be used by some men who wanted to have concubines as a reason to desert their homes. The ability of that "side dish" to provide sexual favors even during the boycott would definitely endear her to many men.
He verdict was that many women did not join the boycott because of fear of battery; because they feared the men would run away from the homes and with the economic meltdown, the spouses would find a way to abscond their responsibilities.
There is no doubt that the women's movement has done a fantastic job; the reason I went to the University and my mother did not speaks a lot. The reason I have a job and can claim equal rights is evidence of major campaigns.
I am for empowerment but does the sex boycott mean that we have achieved everything? I am imagining that for the boycott to be effective, women's reproductive role and contribution in society must be appreciated.
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